By John F. Di Leo -
The following transcript could not be authenticated. It was broadcast from a wiretap accidentally placed in a conference room in Havana, but with the generally low quality of the antiquated electronics available in Cuba, some of the audio was muffled… and there’s always the little matter of questionable translations from the Spanish… but here is what we have, submitted for your consideration without any warranty whatsoever...
Lead Voice #1: Let’s get to work, men. I meet with the Great Satan tomorrow.
Underling Voice A: You’re dying, boss?
Lead Voice #1: No, you idiot, I mean the president of the United States! (Who took this fool off my prisoner list and let him back in the politburo, anyway?)… We need to work out our final list of demands to allow them to reopen an embassy here.
Underling Voice B: We should probably start with reparations, sir.
Lead Voice #1: REPARATIONS??? I’m not paying reparations! We confiscated those billions of dollars worth of land and businesses and accounts over fifty years ago! The statute of limitations is long past!
Underling Voice B: Sorry, sir, I didn’t mean that… although technically, umm… there isn’t really any statute of limitations on nationalization of another country’s property… anyway… the thing is, maybe we could get the USA to pay us reparations.
Lead Voice #1: Interesting… keep talking…